little   darling    it’s   okay  to   be  sad

listen   to me

okay

could you do that for me?

forget what malicious things have barged their way into your eardrums and made you believe that everything you’d ever hear thereafter would sound the same scratchy mean and harsh way

my words are as delicate and soft as the backs of your hands after wiping away your fragile tears from your eyes

listen to my words,

but only if you’d like

I believe in knocking,

could i come in my dear?

when you’re ready, take a deep breath and

listen to each word of mine so intently that you feel nothing else but the sincerity i pour into each sentence

you have a big heart

so big

so strong

bigger and stronger than ANY demon living in your head

please love yourself

you have the right to

and every reason to,

reasons you have yet to discover.

stick around to find those reasons

and go on an adventure across the valleys, mountains, rivers and deserts within your ricage

just drop everything right now

everything you have ever felt

and fill yourself up with love

all the way to the  brim

you are light

the sun’s rays

you are luminous

you are not your dark days

you feel sad

i know darling

i   know

but listen

that is not who you are

because i  know   you

and you have peace and beauty engulfing every atom you are composed of

you are star dust

you have wonder etched into you the way you and your old lover’s initials are etched into that old weeping willow tree by the creek that’s just a stone’s throw away.

you are bright

you are a gem,

shine bright

let go

be   loose

you cannot help but show your colors

at times

underneath your eyelids

when tears inadvertently crash out of your eyes like waves,

i can see the spectrum of colors that live behind the curtain of your sorrow

the rainbow within you is exposed

this is who you are

who you were meant to be

beautiful

light

colorful

you are.

embrace your colors.

pain is the venom that abducted your circulatory system and flows through your veins

but you weren’t meant to hold onto pain the way you held onto your loved one the last time you saw them

pain does not have to be the teddy bear you run to and hold onto because it is comforting and seems to be all you know

hold onto my hand,

take my hand and

let the softness of it remind you of your delicate heart

hold onto me and I will lead you somewhere different,

a different place than where you found yourself last night,

the night before,

and every night that you hoisted a white flag.

you deserve to see the way your eyes light up like flames on a match after it is struck when you are talking about something you love

you deserve to see the way your lips curve so subtly and gracefully on the canvas of your face when you are smiling.

you deserve to hear the way your laugh gently tumbles out from within your core and lays itself upon the atmosphere like a freshly ironed sheet being blown in the wind.

You are a masterpiece,

a piece of mastery

yet you seem to still evolve into something better each day

take my pinky,

here it is,

let me promise you that you are beautiful.

you are the beholder of more than even the universe can carry.

you carry so much pain but also

hope and peace

and your burdens are often way too heavy for you to bear and you cannot help but collapse to the floor.

But

DARLING DO NOT FORGET THOSE MOMENTS WHEN YOU ARE SOARING LIKE A BIRD THAT HAS JUST ESCAPED ITS CAGE FOR THE FIRST TIME IN TEN YEARS,

PASSING IN AND OUT OF THE CLOUD’S SECRET DOORS

AND SOARING THROUGH THE DEAR SKY,

YOUR HOME.

THOSE ARE THE MOMENTS THAT MATTER

your hope carries you heights,

and I know you’ve always been afraid of heights because you are bound to fall down somehow like you do every time.

but embrace your joy and soak in it the way you soak in the melody of your favorite song.

your beauty is undying.

you are undying.

you are never Gone.

you may not be here.

but you are never Gone.

let your soul take a breather,

have it sit back in a chair and just

appreciate itself.

sometimes it’s odd the way our emotions mix within our mind,

like an outfit that doesn’t quite match

but the colors of anger, sorrow and joy somehow still complement each other and ultimately go together like pieces of a puzzle.

the hurricane that you all is no hurricane at all, but lava in a lamp.

when you feel like you’re twisting and spiraling out of control like a disastrous storm,

you truly are the lava in a lamp stretching your incandescent limbs of gooey lava as high as you can.

the lightbulb of thought and creativity within your soul and above your head lights up and begins to warm you up and thaw your frozen contents.

you aren’t spiraling out of control,

you are twirling and dancing like the work of art that you are.

your cheeks are soggy from constantly being soaked in tears

your skin is weaker and flimsier,

so you can easily pull it off and set aside the mask you put on every night before dusk by habit.

your tears are like a murky pond in winter,

elegantly rippling down your face like a porcelain doll tumbling down a snow hill,

with black mascara mixing in and turning your face into a black watercolor painting

but hey guess what

you are still art.

smile because of that.

so many reasons to cry

so many reasons to die

SO MANY REASONS TO SMILE

SO MANY REASONS TO LIVE

i’m sorry for all the times someone has spoke your name in a crude tone that made you shudder and feel disappointed in who you were

but you are not the poor treatment you receive.

people do things to us

and we don’t have a clue why

evil evil people contaminating us

but we are not immune

and our bodies aren’t the best at forming scabs over these gashes that feel permanent

our bodies aren’t the best at fighting off the infection of other’s wickedness

but you live on

you are still light

beauty

colorful

iridescent.

you will never stop shining.

even on days where you can’t find your light it is not because it dissipated to be forgotten forever,

it is hidden behind the clouds that others have built around you like a wall

BUT THEY CAN’T STAY FOREVER AND YOU WILL SHINE ON

it feels like your happiness comes to you in light years,

taking forever to reach you.

but be patient darling

and while you’re waiting

count all of the atoms in your middle finger,

count how many times your heart beats,

punch every deceiving mirror you see that fails to portray what lies within your vessel of a body,

learn to look at clocks less and to stop checking the time,

find yourself in nature in the process of losing yourself in nature,

pay attention to the way every tree waves at you and how even though they are being roughly shaken by the wind they continue to greet others with a friendly wave of “hello” and use their branches and leaves to dance through the windy days,

learn to unapologetically be yourself.

the world is testing you

you are stronger than you know.

unleash that strength,

I know you can’t help but to anyway.

some days you feel like you’ve given in and gave up.

but you didn’t

you took a break.

you surrendered and sweetheart I understand why and that is acceptable,

but you won’t stay down forever

you haven’t given up altogether

sometimes we just need breaks.

and during those breaks

cry as much as your body will let you,

drink lots of water

cuddle whatever you can whenever you can

and smile every once in awhile

at the fact that the sun will rise and you won’t be in that dark hole forever but you will find those moments where you are flying so high in the sky that you can’t tell if you’ve reached outer space yet or not.

keep breathing

that’s all this world can ask of you

do your best

even if your best is staying in bed all day

or barely managing to blink and breath,

it is your best and

im proud of you.

you are not weak.

you are strong for being here and being able to read these words as i type to your luminous soul.