Life is life
I think I died,
Some time ago.
I’v never lied.
If only that was so.
But truth be told,
I’v always loved you.
As sad as this is,
I’m done with fighting.
So state you told me i’d see you for just a day,
That’s alright.
Couldn’t be bothered to state you’re lying,
I’ll get showered and dress. Leave you alone for some rest.
Last night for you I dared to look my best.
And now I feel shitty, Well ain’t that a pity?
Many a man would love to see me like I am.
Yet I think it’s you I just try too hard to please.
And if only you knew how this man talks to me,
who is as fiery as the passion I once had.
And I tell him the truth that I love you,
But that i’m at a lost....are you a lost cause??
And I told him i’m not through with you,
and he thanked me for putting him in his place.
Yet still agrees one day he’ll want more then this friend I am....
And I say “I don’t know where i’m going, i just know where i am now”
But really its showing that i’v given up some how.
I wont text! I wont write!
I’ll see you Saturday i’ll even stay the night.
But if you want me, Jesus Christ. Put up a fight.
Be the man I see inside.
You look at me in a different way.
I know iv changed on the outside,
But can’t you see, its still just me.
I can’t help the problems i have,
You want kids, that’s grand.
But i’m still young, I dunno how my bodies oh so wrong.
I take my tablets to fix me inside and the change my body so one day I can bare a child.
Just like you wanted,
but now i’m haunted by the version of me you loved.
Curves for my tattoos to hug.
But now this stretched skin on my tubby.
You look at me so funny.
And if i could change, i’d not do it.
This is me and if you’re through with it....
I’ll fight.... but if its not right.
Then simply tell me you’re going.
Just know... I’m in love with you....and its never stopped growing.
But i can’t do what i’v been doing.
So i’m going back to start.
When i could rip your heart apart.
Call me or text me... I won’t be the first to break.
I’ll be out having fun. Being Sweet me.
Put up a fight.... Get me back to this point.
In life.... when you could of had me as your wife.
(2013)
This poem is basically on how i put so much into love but how when do men just rely on me to always be there. I'd never cheat or lie to someone i love but i'll be damned if i'd lie down and die.
