(break from sanity)

Its quickly becoming all i think about
trust you, that we could work this out.
But you disappear on days when your meant to be here.
Quickly letting the shadowed ghosts of anxiety creep in
and I’m telling you its that that’s killing me.
And yeah I’ll agree I was full of stupidity
when I gave you money that was meant for  more then the horrid drugs you adored.
But just like now I thought I’d faith.
I trusted when I had no light in your eyes, the tunnel stretched on no end in sight.
And I hate to ever claim you lie but you do.
And you blame my stupidity for trusting a man I thought and still think loves me
like I love you,
so stupidly I didn’t just get up and over you.
If id a horse id ride until the last fall
thrown up and down and trampled on,
that’s how I feel
when I’m betrayed and when I’m cheated out of a love story you claimed was ours.
I’m no Disney princess but stupidly I thought our “love” had power.
Another hour goes by and still you are no where in sight,
le me make this all right.
Fuck you ray,
just go hurry out of my life.
Be honest and tell me,
truthfully I’d never be your wife.
I dunno if I’m sane,
or if so full with pain.
Of the idea of losing you again,
feels like a storm, I’m caught in the rain.
Sobbing and screaming like the thunder and shocked by the power of the light.
I’m caught up on our plight, caught on the ideas that you gave up and i’m right
when really I’ve no clue if you really did give up, or if what you claim is true.
Do you love me like I forever love you....
Or am I just one of the tiny things you run so stupidly from
letting stupidity and insanity rule on....

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