Who I once was and what I’ve become
I once was blazing and bright like the setting sun,
But now I am dark, bland, and hollow.
I’m overwhelmed with grief for what I’ve become,
And for who I will never be tomorrow.
Thoughts of suicide had once scared me,
Now it has become my only constant.
It is so wrong, but will make it so easy
To escape this never-ending cycle of conflict.
Comfort and joy is replaced with loneliness and tears.
On the outside I appear fine, but I’m on my deathbed.
Empty, useless, and ugly is how I head into the New Years,
Which is why I’d just be better off dead.
Just some thoughts about how I've been feeling recently. I hope I escape my thoughts of suicide because I know it is wrong since God is the giver and taker of life. Therefore, I am constantly struggling between trying to live and love who I am or die because I am a failure and I truly hate myself.
