I found out that one of my friends killed himself. I just spent a good two hours searching his name in Google and Facebook trying to look for some indication that it wasn’t true.
It is.
I saw something I never knew about him. He had an account on this website. He wrote just two poems, and the profile picture was kind of blurry, but when I read them, I knew it was him.

I just wanted to say to him, that what you did was really shitty. I’ve wanted to kill myself too, so believe me, I get it. And really, the only difference is that someone stepped in literally seconds before I went through with it. But you did it. You fucking did it. And now everyone is left here with this bitter taste in our mouths forever. I know I’m being selfish, because I know how much pain you were in, but you were selfish too. You were so selfish. And I fucking love you and I fucking hate you, but now, forever on, when I hear your name it will bring up this feeling. This feeling that no one should have to feel. You left a wife, two parents, a brother, and so many friends. People who love you. Or loved, I’m not sure anymore.
Now we sit here, crying and drilling reality into our brains so we don’t wake up every morning and have to relive the horror of your suicide.
I know you were hurting, so good job. Now everyone else is.