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Never ends

I just wish I could tell you.
I wish you could know what’s true.
The insults and emotional abuse.
The way he degrades me and won’t let me loose.
He has a dark side so bad to explain.
He is making me live in a world of of hurt and pain.
I made a huge mistake.
My self control is at stake.
He tests me in ways you cannot believe.
He wants me to lash out and deceive.
He wants to take away my power and strength.
He wants to weaken me till I lose  it and reach my lowest length.
He scares me sometimes i hide.
Yet everyone only sees his so called good side.
He lies and and manipulates me.
In ways that I cannot just let myself free.
I don’t tell anyone what is really going on.
Because I do not want any one to see I’m not that strong.
To train the heart to just let go.
Is something to learn and enable to grow.
I know I must leave before its to late.
Because I cannot sit here forever in such a state.
I need to find the strength to break free.
And realise the most important thing In my life is me.
Before I lose myself And soul complete.
I need to find the strength I lost and fight this for myself I can’t allow him to defeat.

(2014)

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