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Quiet November

It is now the 5th of October, the leaves are all falling and changing color. I built the last autumn out of words and memories of you, that I haven’t quite figured out how to release  from my chest. Your soul turned Into a quiet November, turning me inside out, for all that time i had known you you had been a noisy August night, beating in and out of my chest, like a heartbeat, that beats too fast. I’m wrapped inside the smell of home, but darling ever since you left, home is not what this place is anymore.
As I fumbled around inside this empty October, I learned of every tree and star that lived on this earth beside me, but I had never felt so lost. I longed for winter, and a heart that beats right. So I carried the world upon my back, and I ran. I ran not knowing where I was headed, but I ran faster than I ever had before. Hundreds of miles later, when the stars became unrecognizable, I stopped. With swollen feet and lungs that could not hold one more breath, I had reached a town filled with wildflowers, and a moon brighter than I had ever seen before. So I took off my shoes and set them beside me, and I lay down to rest my head beneath a willow tree. As I looked up into the sky at the silver stars, I felt for the first time that I wasn’t on my own. I felt for the first time, that finally I was home.

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