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Self-Esteem

Such a funny word
Isn’t it?
How we feel about ourselves…
That’s what it is fueled on
How much fuel are you giving it?
Enough to make your ego explode
Or for it to just hide behind your emotions?
Tell you the truth I am like that
I have no ego
Self-esteem isn’t even in my vocabulary
Why?
Here’s my reason
 
My entire life I’ve always been shot down
All the things I loved
That I had a passion for
Were blow up
And *pop*
I was broken each time
Both the times I wanted to cry
“Who did such a deed?”
My family
I know what’s like to not have support from family
Don’t worry you’re not alone
It hurts
In case you didn’t know
 
I stopped singing
I stopped drawing
But if I do draw they aren’t bright pictures
The only thing I have is my writing
And even that is being taken away from me
Pushing me to become interested in things I KNOW I’m not interested in
But does anyone ever listen to me?
NO
Because I am just a kid
And I don’t know anything
Well newsflash:
 
I know a lot more than you think
So thanks for the faith
 
Self-esteem is something I’ll never get
Not until I leave of course
I know I can do great things
But in my own way
So please I beg of you
Just leave me be
 
I’m losing my mind
Trying to stand tall
I don’t think I can take much more
Before my brain just burst
 
You think I’m so brave
That I can stand in front of a crowd
Well I can’t
And when I told you that
The head shake of disappointment followed
 
Thanks for being behind me!
If I fall down will you pick me up?
No? Ok
Good
You’ll be doing what I wanted you to do for a long time
 
Giving me DEATH

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