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You're Suppose to be My Father

When I was a little girl
I knew my mother
Where were you when I needed you?
When my mother was in pain?
 
You were on the rode
Driving all over
Never spending time with your family
Leaving us for months
And returning home to expect
A welcoming smile
 
Ha! To that!
We left you didn’t we?
Packed our stuff and left!
You lost everything
Including you family
 
As I grew older
I never got to know you
I cried in the corner wishing you would come back
Wishing that my family would be whole
 
That wish soon became a memory
For you started to play dirty
You used cards that weren’t in your pile
And tried to harm my family
 
You tried to harm my mother
Took from my grandma
Try to buy my love
And destroy the only people I had
 
I never understood
Why mother didn’t trust you
But now everything is clear
And now my heart is cracked
 
I want to be with you
I want to love you
But how can I love someone
I don’t even know?
 
Your suppose to be my father
Your suppose to stick around
I understand we’ve had our ups and downs
But that doesn’t mean you can buy me
 
I cry at night
Thinking about how I don’t have a dad
That I can talk to and not feel weird
I know I have God
But I want my earthly father too
All I want is to know you
 
Stop saying that your trying
And put your words to acts
For the older I get the farther you become
For I will either love or hate you
Which one do you want?
 
Stop acting so stupid
And get your shit together!
I’m tired of telling my friends
Negative things about you!
 
I understand it’ll take some time
But you door to me is closing
I’m going through a tough time
And your not there to help me
 
Ya I have my mom
But sometimes that’s not enough
I need a father by my side
Someone that I can touch
 
Please just come back to me
I miss you so much
I just want a father in my life
And to close the crack within my heart

Ya this is about my dad. I never really knew him and I don't know him even know. It's hard for me to talk to him because I've never had a guy to talk to. So this poem is super personal so I would appreciate if I don't get any negative comments. But if your just gonna be like that then go ahead.

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