how I wish I wasn't here
a high pitched whine stabs into my ears
as all other sounds fade, hidden in the foreground,
the laughs and shouts and the clashing of empties ring
as I sweat staring at one spot, to keep the demon comatose,
this parties in full swing the booze is flowing and the bbq’s lit
I’m sat alone in the corner twitching gently like a mad man,
in a whirlwind, a fuzz, my mind goes from thought to dream
trying to keep me away from this odd form of self flogging,
I smell the air, burnt meat... beer and wine spilled
the demon sits and proudly devours the scents of drunkenness,
with the thirst of a hungry vampire risen from cold hibernation
my heart beats quick, hands sweat and all emotions exaggerate,
how I wish I wasn’t here
how I wish I had choices to make,
how I wish I didn’t feel these things
how I wish this gathering was my wake,
I saw two birds fly overhead as I was lost in a dream of self pity
they perched upon an old worn out and weathered tree,
they didn’t seem to notice or care that it was the only one on the street
they were lost in their own dreams, too....I suppose,
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