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My mother went to her low-paying job each morning and my father, who
didn’t have a job, left each morning too. Although most of the neighbors
were unemployed he didn’t want them to think he was jobless. So he got into his car each morning at the same time and drove off as if he were going to work. Then in the evening he would return at exactly the same time. It was good for me because I had the place to myself. They locked the house but I knew how to get in. I would unhook the screen door with a piece of
cardboard. They locked the porch door with a key from the inside. I slid a newspaper under the door and poked the key out. Then I pulled the newspaper from under the door and the key came with it. I would unlock the door and go in. When I left I would hook the screen door, lock the back porch door from
the inside, leaving the key in. Then I would leave through the front door,
putting the latch on lock.
I liked being alone. One day I was playing one of my games. There was a clock on the mantle with a second hand and I held contests to see how long I could hold my breath. Each time I did it I exceeded my own record. I went through much agony but I was proud each time I added some seconds to my record. This day I added a full five seconds and I was standing getting my breath back when I walked to the front window. It was a large window covered by red drapes. There was a crack between the drapes and I looked out. Jesus Christ! Our window was directly across from the front porch of the Andersons’ house. Mrs. Anderson was sitting on the steps, and I could look right up her dress. She was about 23 and had marvelously shaped legs. I could see almost all the way up her dress. Then I remember my father’s army binoculars. They were on the top shelf of his closet. I ran and got them,
ran back, crouched down and adjusted them to Mrs. Anderson’s legs. It took me right up there! And it was different from looking at Miss Gredis’ legs:
you didn’t have to pretend you weren’t looking. You could concentrate. And I did. I was right there. I was red hot. Jesus Christ, what legs, what flanks! And each time she moved, it was unbearable and unbelievable.
I got down on my knees and I held the binoculars with one hand and
pulled my cock out with the other. I spit in my palm and began. For a moment I thought I saw a flash of panties. I was about to come. I stopped. I kept looking with the binocs and then I started rubbing again. When I was about to come I stopped again. Then I waited and began rubbing again. This time I knew I wouldn’t be able to stop. She was right there. I was looking right up her! It was like fucking. I came. I spurted all over the hardwood floor in
front of the window. It was white and thick. I got up and went to the
bathroom and got some toilet paper, came back and wiped it up. I took it back to the toilet and flushed it away.
Mrs. Anderson came and sat on those steps almost every day and each
time she did I got the binocs and whacked-off.
If Mr. Anderson ever finds out about this, I thought, he’ll kill me . .
.
My parents went to the movies every Wednesday night. The theatre had drawings for money and they wanted to win some money. It was on a Wednesday night that I discovered something. The Pirozzis lived in the house south of
ours. Our driveway ran along the north side of their house and there was a window which looked into their front room. The window was veiled by a thin curtain. There was a wall which became an arch over the front of our
driveway and there were bushes all about. When I got between that wall and
the window, in among all those bushes, nobody could see me from the street, especially at night.
I crawled in there. It was great, better than I expected. Mrs. Pirozzi
was sitting on the couch reading a newspaper. Her legs were crossed, and in
an easy chair across the room, Mr. Pirozzi was reading a newspaper. Mrs.
Pirozzi was not as young as Miss Gredis or Mrs. Anderson, but she had good legs and she had on high heels and almost every time she turned a page of
her newspaper, she’d cross her legs and her skirt would climb higher and I would see more.
If my parents come home from the movie and catch me here, I thought,
then my life is over. But it’s worth it. It’s worth the risk.
I stayed very quiet behind the window and stared at Mrs. Pirozzi’s
legs. They had a large collie, Jeff, who was asleep in front of the door. I
had looked at Miss Gredis’ legs that day in English class, then I had whacked-off to Mrs. Anderson’s legs, and now– there was more. Why
didn’t Mr. Pirozzi look at Mrs. Pirozzi’s legs? He just kept reading his newspaper. It was obvious that Mrs. Pirozzi was trying to tease him because her skirt kept climbing higher and higher. Then she turned a page and crossed her legs very fast and her skirt flipped back exposing her
pure white thighs. She was just like buttermilk! Unbelievable! She
was best of all!
Then from the corner of my eye I saw Mr. Pirozzi’s legs move.
He stood up very quickly and moved toward the front door. I started
running, crashing through the bushes. I heard him open his front door. I was down the driveway and into our backyard and behind the garage. I stood a moment, listening. Then I climbed the back fence, over the vines and on over into the next backyard. I ran through that yard and up the driveway and I began dog-trotting south down the street like a guy practicing for track. There was nobody behind me but I kept trotting. If he knows it was me, if he tells my father, I’m dead. But maybe he just let the dog out to take a shit?
I trotted down to West Adams Boulevard and sat on a streetcar bench. I sat there five minutes or so, then I walked back home. When I got there, my parents weren’t back yet. I went inside, undressed, turned out the lights
and waited for morning . . .
Another Wednesday night Baldy and I were taking our usual short cut
between two apartment houses. We were on our way to his father’s wine cellar when Baldy stopped at a window. The shade was almost down but not quite. Baldy stopped, bent, and peeked inside. He waved me over.
“What is it?” I whispered.
“Look!”
There was a man and a woman in bed, naked. There was just a bedsheet partly over them. The man was trying to kiss the woman and she was pushing him away.
“God damn it, let me have it, Marie!”
“No!”
“But I’m hot, please.”
“Take your god-damned hands off me!” “But, Marie, I love you!”
“You and your fucking love . . .”
“Marie, please. ”
“Will you shut up?”
The man turned toward the wall. The woman picked up a magazine, bunched a pillow behind her head, and began reading it.
Baldy and I walked away from the window,
“Jesus,” said Baldy, “that made me sick!”
“I thought we were going to see something,” I said. When we got to the
wine cellar Baldy’s old man had put a big padlock on the cellar door.
We tried that window again and again but we never actually saw anything happen. It was always the same.
“Marie, it’s been a long time. We’re living together, you know. We’re married!”
“Big fucking deal!”
“Just this once, Marie, and I won’t bother you again, I won’t
bother you for a long time, I promise!”
“Shut up! You make me sick!”
Baldy and I walked away.
“Shit,” I said.
“Shit,” he said.
“I don’t think he’s got a cock,” I said.
“He might as well not have,” said Baldy. We stopped going back there.

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