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Dope

I have a secret.
That I can not tell anybody.
Because you see this secret is not only my own,
But everyone whom I loved
And those I believed to have loved me.
I have stories for days
And days.
My mind is always going
And there are so many things going on inside my head that it takes everything out of me to focus on one thought.
It’s a toe curling, chest cramping sensation,
Like shooting, running, morphines or opanas,
Except you feel it through out your whole body.
First your head feels marvelously heavy,
Yet light as a feather,
Like a limb going numb,
Except it’s your brain,
Like popping a bunch of Xanax
Benzoxazepines,
Or pain pills.
Except with morphine,
Everything feels far away,
Like you are in a dream,
And no matter what happens,
You know you will be okay,
Because the only thing that matters
Is those drugs
That medicine
That people take so that they can go on living.
At least that to me is how it feels like to do drugs,
But nobody be like me,
Because I do everything to the extreme.
When you sell your soul,
you’re not allowed to keep any of it.

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