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The War Within

Mr. Miller, the man next door, seemed to be a very quiet man. He lived alone in a small house with the curtains always drawn. He was a disheveled man who never smiled. His nosey neighbors kept track of every move he made when he was outside, but nobody knew what was going on inside the house.
One fine morning, they saw him carrying suitcases to the car. One neighbor went over to ask him if he needed help. “No but thank you very much. I can manage myself,” he replied in a nervous voice. So off he drove on his mysterious trip. Nobody knew where he was going and what was inside the suitcases.
Later on that day, there was breaking news that interrupted the regular programming on the television. Someone had shot and killed a number of people that had attended a football game at the local high school. The authorities identified the dead shooter who turned to be that quiet man Mr. Miller, who drove off that morning on a trip with his suitcases. What could have been the motive for the killings?
Man is a natural born aggressor. Some act out their aggression, but almost every man subdues the urge and becomes civil.  Unless he is totally passive, which is freakish in nature, he will never fantasize about exercising his power. He doesn’t even get an adrenaline high from the thought of it.
Mr. Miller had a war going on within himself. He was calm on the outside, but demented on the inside. He knew about being righteous, but couldn’t satisfy himself and live with that feeling. It didn’t make him feel manly enough. He was always alone and at odds in his quiet way with the people around him. By disassociating himself with them, he could fantasize about being their superior. By being his powerful self, he went out to prove his superiority. Instead of earning that distinction in a civilized manner, he had to earn it that one fleeting moment when the bullets were flying and his adrenaline was flowing. Some say it is the devil that took hold; that war within him between good and evil. The evil side won the battle.
They say forgiveness is a virtue, but it is hard to forgive someone who took the lives of so many innocent people on that fateful day. If only Mr. Miller would have communicated with the people around him, he would have gained their respect, and the interaction would have prevented him from doing what he did. They would have shown him that they are people instead of objects, people that could have helped him with his affliction. The evil side of his mind kept him isolated from his neighbors and motivated him to act out his superiority over them.
It is impossible to keep peace over millions of people. All we can do is hope that the influence of love can penetrate as many souls as possible, and the violence will lessen in the coming days.

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