Helpless
Why do you drink so much?
“Because I’m bored.”
But no, you’re tired.
You’re cold and old and
oh so tired.
No man to keep you warm at night,
alone you sip your special brew
and sit and stare;
try not to think.
And dull your eyes so they can’t see
And hide the cans
Like you’re afraid, ashamed,
alarmed how much you harm yourself.
Ignoring calls and losing touch
with the whole world.
You make your own
and sit alone
and drink
and drink
and drink
and drink...
and vomit later in the kitchen sink.
All your hurt, all your tears,
all your woes, all your fears,
all the things you don’t know how to say
fester in the plughole and
make the whole house stink.
But you’re unreachable,
un-teachable,
unresponsive;
dull.
A hand extended isn’t seen through beer-goggles, you know.
And me,
I eat my tea.
Quietly.
And watch the woman I know and love
settle in her own insanity.
Not saying how I hate this monster
how much I want to tear it out.
Occasionally pointing out things on the TV.
Failing to engage you in any part of life.
Wait until you start to cry
so I can be there - or at least try.
But a child is helpless when
the parent is lost to them.
And then
when you fall asleep
I cry a bit myself.
I cry because your loneliness
has caused you to abandon me.
I tuck a blanket round you
and go upstairs to bed.
Hoping tomorrow will be different
and that you’ll want to live again.
Liked or faved by...
