money
Money is the root of all evil
Money is just motivation to
Having your bills paid.
But I certainly don’t act that way
I worry about money day and night
I go to work to a job I hate
All so I can earn money
Just so I can pay the bills
Money is my master
My life conforms to what money wants
So I can have enough to survive
As long as money is my driving force
I will never do what I love
I will never serve the world
Because I’m too selfish too notice
Poor people are obsessed with money
Rich people are obsessed with money
Middle class people are obsessed with money
So many people, so many reasons to be obsessed
Mostly for survival, some for power
Some for experience, some for pleasure
Americans to spend, the Chinese to save
Some countries to finance their wars
Individuals, families, organizations
Businesses, non-profits and governments
Have become debtors with money as their slave
Because of the love of money
Once I had wanted to serve the world
I didn’t even want or need much money
So focused on serving the masses
I was happy and elated as could be
Until I ran out of money
Until the bills I couldn’t pay
And my family I could not support
Then money my purpose became
The more I focused on money
The less money I had
I worried, I fretted, I was paralyzed in fear
I tried and I tried to have enough to get by
I went to school so I could earn money
I started businesses to earn money
I went into sales to earn money
Because I doubted I could earn very much
I dropped what I loved
Because I had no money
After years I returned to my passion
But my passion was still ruled by money
Every action I took was laced
With the subtle desire for money
Every person I spoke with
Every chap I attempted to convince
All had to deal with my needs for money
They felt my neediness, my desire for worth
My desire to feel good about myself
My worry for survival of not having enough
After a decade of futility and emptiness
I slowly began to wake up
To the scripture I had heard long ago
After I had gained some worth in myself
To this day I can still feel my need for money
The need has not died down completely
But my desire to serve has returned
My desire to contribute to humanity
Every day I attempt to quell my money addiction
Knowing I will always have enough
Knowing I can be wealthy without needing to be
Because having money is not the purpose of life
You and I both know that love and contributing to humanity
Is the true reason you and I are here
But too often you and I don’t act like it
Our need for money masks our desire to serve
Only with constant awareness of vigilance
Can I sense my subtle need creep up
When I go out for dinner, when I have to spend money
When the bills require my attention
When the debt lies heavy on my shoulders
When it’s time to buy a gift
Every time I receive a paycheck
Every year when the taxes I pay
Every time I look at my bank statement
Every time I attempt to sell
Every prospect that I interact with
My awareness must keep me in line
Because in all these moments
I still notice my subtle need
Creeping up from the pit of my stomach
To divert my attention to it
So I breathe deeply and regain my focus
Of why I am here on this earth
To love and to serve my fellow man
And to practice every day in spite of my weakness.
(2013)
