IT’S THE TRIVIAL THINGS
On Thursday,
September 9 of the current year 2021
I started to feel constant pain
in my lumbar back or lower back.
I suffer from a disease called
Degenerative Lumbar Disc Disease;
apparently, it is not a fatal disease
and there are treatments and exercises
to relieve pain symptoms
for example:
Epidural Steroid Injection,
which reduces disc inflammation
and helps to relieve pain.
Next Friday morning,
September 17,
I have an appointment with the family doctor
to talk about this pain and how to control it.
I have read that there are surgeries,
in the case that the pain increases,
impairing my freedom of body mobility
and decreasing my life quality.
For the moment,
I don’t know if the pain is going to be degenerative,
I have read that it can hurt
up to the hips and upper legs;
and also read that, after a while
the unhealthy disc collapses
and there is no inflammation nor pain.
In the present moment
I can’t hold back the sadness and fear
that this situation could get worse.
For the moment I can stand, and I can walk
I can even ride a bicycle,
I can do light exercises,
but there are things that definitely
I cannot do, like:
Dancing, or
carrying something relatively heavy,
like carrying my daughter Emma,
I can’t play and run with my daughter
in the garden,
I can’t make sudden movements,
sneezing hurts,
and at the moment I’m not a good partner
for sexual intercourse.
When transiting through the street,
there are scenes that reach,
deep into my subconscious and psychology,
for example:
See a senior citizen
walking without a cane or walking stick,
pain or setbacks;
also seeing a healthy family enjoy life...\n
Instead, there are scenes that help
my psychology, like:
seeing a good wife
walking her partner in a wheelchair
on the perimeter trail of “Väike Viik.”
Pain disturbs my mind and emotions
and it does not allow me to be calm;
it is in these moments,
when I put my longevity on trial
and I consider young death as a possibility...
It is the trivial things
those that touch my heart, such as:
Sleeping without pain
Waking-Up
Enjoying the taste of food
Drinking a glass of water or
a delicious fruit smoothie with honey
Walking during twilight
Running and feeling the wind on your face
Dancing and feeling the sensuality
of your partner
Seeing your daughter play
Riding a bicycle
Drawing a watercolor
Having the freedom of movement
To breathe...
You must not let a single day go by
without enjoying the trivial things;
since health is a virtue and life is fragile
health can be lost at any moment
or even life.
Some things upset my mind and emotions
for example, to know if I will get healthy:
to enjoy a concert interpreted by my daughter;
to live and enjoy the project of our future
built house;
to get to enjoy my daughter’s wedding;
to enjoy life with my wife
having achieved financial freedom;
to continue practicing as an architect;
to keep on drawing watercolors.
I can’t stand the impressions
that I provoke in my direct family
when the pain in my lower back attacks me,
and I scream or contort slightly;
and I long to have been a young father
to be able to enjoy family life
with health and well-being.
I can’t stand Home Abandonment
when the most beautiful thing in this life
is living with the children and the family
with health and what better
than well-being too;
living with the family and
seeing the development of the future
of the couple and the children;
enjoying family successes.
It’s the trivial things...
https://www.spine-health.com/video/posterior-lumbar-interbody-fusion-plif-video
