#AmericanWriters
My fellow man I do not care for. I often ask me, What’s he there f… The only answer I can find Is, Reproduction of his kind. If I’m supposed to swallow that,
The grackle’s voice is less than m… His heart is black, his eye is yel… He bullies more attractive birds With hoodlum deeds and vulgar word… And should a human interfere,
More than a catbird hates a cat, Or a criminal hates a clue, Or the Axis hates the United Sta… That’s how much I love you. I love you more than a duck can sw…
People live forever in Jacksonvil… But you don’t have to live forever… The entrance requirements for gram… You only have to live until your c… From that point on you start looki…
I know lots of men who are in love… And to fall out with their loved o… They are conciliatory at every opp… Because all they want is serenity… Yes, many the swain who has finall…
Adam Had’em
In January everything freezes. We have two children. Both are sh… This is our January rule: One girl in bed, and one in school… In February the blizzard whirls.
Who is the happy husband? Why, in… 'Tis he who’s useless in the time… Who, asked to unclasp a bracelet o… Contrives to be utterly futile, fu… Or when a zipper nips his loved on…
A child need not be very clever To learn that “Later, dear” means…
The song of canaries Never varies, And when they’re moulting They’re pretty revolting.
The hunter crouches in his blind ‘Neath camouflage of every kind And conjures up a quacking noise To lend allure to his decoys This grown-up man, with pluck and…
Bound to your bookseller, leap to… Deluge your dealer with bakshish a… Lean on the counter and never say… Wodehouse and Wooster are with us… Flourish the fish-slice, your butt…
Being a father Is quite a bother. You are as free as air With time to spare, You’re a fiscal rocket
Foreigners are people somewhere el… Natives are people at home; If the place you’re at Is your habitat, You’re a foreigner, say in Rome.
To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you’re wrong, admit it; Whenever you’re right, shut up.
