Am I worth it?
Time and time again...
I felt like I was worth nothing.
I never found value in myself.
Never tried to polish my talents.
Never tried to see the good in my abilities.
Because I saw no point in it.
In any of it...
I question myself every day if I’m good enough.
Though the answer may be simple,
It’s not for me.
People either tell me I’m selfish or adored.
That I have everything going well for me.
That I’m talented and smart.
Lovable and kind.
Caring and Empathetic...
So I had no reason to be sad or alone.
They don’t know the real me...
I’ve been damaged for a long time.
Ripped apart with no consent...
And the criminal roams free with no guilt.
Leaving me to my self loathing and hating the world.
This is not the real me...
I once knew myself as someone that loved and cared for people.
Now... I push everyone away as if they were my enemies.
I can’t trust anyone else in this world but myself.
It suffocates me every single day...
This depression is unbearable...
My tears have dried up years ago...
The shine in my eyes gone...
I’m drowning in a black hole... my mind is a fog.
I wanted my life to end... and never wake up again...
But...
The only true friend I once had ever loved more than myself...
Still has arms open wide...
Waiting for me to return.
But... do I deserve it?
Am I worth it?
