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Static Noise

Memories flood through my head
Drowning me once again
Days turn to years
But the suffering never ends
Memories resurfacing
 
I try to block it all out
I’ve tried so hard to forget
To leave it all behind
Like it never did exist
But the memories
Refuse to be ignored
Their presence
Demanding more
Than the shallow grave
Where they lay
Wedged in my heart
 
I Wish I could escape
This madness in my head
To forget yesterday
While the unkind years fade
No therapy can eradicate this disease
 
The world’s callus touch
Sticks to my skin
It’s grimy fingerprints
Leaving marks
With each new place I’ve been
A constant reminder
Of the dirt on my hands
 
The years have flown by
I have my share of regret
My mistakes leaving tracks
After my every step
A constant reminder
Of the demons lurking
In my sordid past
Eager to pounce
To dig a hole if I let it
 
A mirror stands before me
And a stranger stares back
Her features erased from her face
Black and blue bruises
Scream her secrets aloud
While tears declare war
 
The heaviness in my heart
Keeps me stiff
As I try to collect
The broken pieces
Of my damaged soul
From the long years passed
Decaying from neglect
 
My heart bleeding
For the lies I’ve told
And the damage I’ve done
 
While my regrets prance around
Their proud little mouths
Leaving nothing unsaid
Mistakes screaming my name
 
As I watch the venom fill my veins
The poison the cause of my shame
Waiting for memories to fade
Blurring the lines
Where the bad turns to good
 
As I sink back into silence
No more static for now.

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