pov u find another mentally ill bitch at the pool
“who ruined winter for you?” “i did.”
i’m busy with bruised legs covered… i’ve got my black boots kicked up… on a hot swing set in the backyard of a church that doesn’t want me. i’m saying fuck, getting familiar…
do you love me, genuinely? don’t scoff and say, “yes, of cour… think about it for a minute. do you love me? when i’m crying like we’ve got roo…
you ask me if i have dreams and i start telling you about the… that haunt me when i try to sleep but then you look at me and laugh uncomfortably and say,
i have my mothers hands and her sh… i’ve got my dad’s jaw and his impa… i’m ten times as angry as my mothe… and twice as sad as my father is. here’s the thing, part one:
everything is muffled and clean wh… i have bathed in dust and soil, an… i lay on your cool kitchen tile an… a constant reminder that i’m here,… but now with me here there is mud…
you go to touch me, and i bite your soft, warm fingers… then when you’ve left, i cry because i’m cold.
i think i do my best to be good wh… it’s not shaped for my kind of rag… it has no place for sickness, and… i drown in it, i suffocate in it. paradise is not a hospice, but i a…
i flick the lighter on, on, on off. a useless fidget, one that turns my thumb gray and r…
he’s full of tuesdays and peonies, and i’m made up of saturdays and b… so he says, forgive and forget, and i say, get high and throw dart… he’s got his arms open wide
did you know if sharks stop swimmi… my mother found joy in domesticity… with three kids and a husband, bak… and good for her, good for fucking… my safe place is flats filled with…
i don’t miss you as much as i thou… isn’t that terrible? aren’t i such… i told you, curling into myself, s… that i smell your clothes when i f… i refused to wash them or set them…
when the ash settles down and you… wild and dancing, you see blackeni… you see the ending of it all and i… the way it dances and beckons you… the way you wish it would.
i water the roses and i shear thei… because what is beauty without adm… what is anything at all if you can…
i gave you open front doors, swing… i left you out in my backyard with… it’s not my fault you stayed like… i screamed your name over a coal e… standing in the middle of the trai…