& how does one say no... to something they obtain... something that they’ve created in their brain in order for them to just feel sane......something that deliberately  pushes them away from where they once felt pain....how do you refrain... and simply say it’s ok because one day it’ll all be plain and simple to something that was way too difficult to try and figure out at the time because you knew it requires some thinking to make your self feel alive and be able to coincide all the feelings that are deep down inside that you just couldn’t ever seem to let go of and over ride....