Roundabout
Sick of this distortion
Reality sliding around like
Bumper cars full of wayward children
Celebrating the escape from a terror in the night.
I want to get off this ride and pretend the nightmare is over
Dover is where my mind seems to have traveled
As I ponder over this orange juice flavored disco dream
Seemingly caught somewhere.
Trapped like a fish unaware
Staring at myself
Wondering why I cannot seem to escape the loop
Hoop earringed childhood
In which confusion always reigned
I feign ignorance because of my idiot brother
Smothering me with his shame
I cannot breathe so I kick and scream
And scheme to end the torment
So I go Ender on his ass
Not the moon
But the worm-like, episodic type
That knew 125% violence was the answer.
Her voice then rings out
Calming, siren song
And this dashing hero dashes upon the shore
Whoring out his dreams for minimum wage.
Sage advice given, received, tumbled, locked
Perceived, sieved, unwound yet still fucking bound!
So I cycle through the madness
One turn of the wheel
And away I go
Showing that even the simplest tasks elude me.
“We really shouldn’t be doing this,” I exclaim.
Proclaiming what was obvious for all to see
Me, here, quietly suffering and clawing for a way out.
Do you even know what I’m going on about?
Say yes, please.
Appease the shouting in the corners of my mind.
Unwind the thread and follow me into this maze of haze
And mirrors.
Illusions become solutions in timeless void
Where I seek solace from rainy nights
And rainier futures
Thunder booms, danger looms past a darkened horizon.
Shore this all up to crashing waves
Hell-bent upon reformation.
I feel and it never ends
Vented pressure is what you experience now.
So...
I ask for a way off this ride.
I am bound by invisibility
And it has me
Quite pissed off.
19 Oct 2020
I need to vent. Constantly. There is too much pressure. This journey is the start of something wonderful!
