Such Sadness
By: Ezekiel Gonzales
I don’t want you to know—not all of it
the good, the bad, the dirty
No, there’s no such thing when I try to speak my truth
Just for a moment, let me hold your hand in mine
it’s you, not him
it’s you, not her
it’s you, it’s me
Did it ever cross your mind what the little me looks like?
Every drop, every little whisper we shared
buried deep in our souls and seared in to our minds
all the things we wished and wanted,
pushed under the dark
I want to rip her apart, I want to tear him to shreds
Wisps of agony settle in the wind
Biting back my words, I’ll wait
There’s something missing—something I know that’s important
But what’s one more day
When did eating become a chore, when did the bathroom become a sanctuary?
pinch, poke and prod at my insides
Shoving them deep in my throat
I hope I gag and choke before they reach too far
Death is a sinful prayer
I’ll pray for it
Never one for a party—I’ll show you a smile if you ask
Flash to the left, flash to the right
Party over
Good Child; mature, a quiet little thing
when did you last say, “No”
Keep your head down
do as told
Good Misfit
Dirty little secrets from a dirty little Angel
Fallen from the kingdom and disgraced by the one most dear—
the only one left
No farewell was needed
I hope you burn, spoken like a true gentleman
Tearing, breaking us apart in such a way
Did you care?
Come back for one moment,
let me say my peace
Time is never kind, never fair
not to you,
not to me, not to us
There’s no such thing as “I wish”
“I should’ve”
I know what happened,
how I stood by and watched—a coward
I will be your shield
Let me take your hits
