Untitled
I hope one day everything i say to you explodes in the bottom of your stomach and makes it way to your cerebellum.
You could listen if you want to
Or
You could close your ears
I’m most certain that everything will be heard once i disappear
You want me to leave you alone?!
Mad because i locked the door and made you sleep on the couch all alone
How dare you react to my reaction to your actions?!
I means seriously
Im acting childish?!
Huh? You doing the child shit
I’ve given you
Loyalty
Integrity
Love
Honesty
Everything you wanted in a family
When you couldn’t count on your own family
Scared to acknowledge love when you see it
So you flee it
But i stood my ground
And standing im here now
Guess what?!
after this fight
I’ll watch my hands with you
Give you the boot?!
Nah.
I’ll open the door for you
But before you leave
There’s just one request please . . .
Can you run to the supermarket and get me a list of things
Path mark, Keyfood, shop rite, and western beef
Then,
get on the train
Meet me in otisville
That’s right New York.
Yes, carrying all those bags using your man power of course.
And before you get on the train
Can you put money on the phone?
There’s just one person I’ve been trying to call
When you get up here i need white t-shirts and socks
colored boxers is what i opt
Did you get that stuff i ask for?
Did you wrap it real tight?
And stuff it right?
Don’t worry the metal detectors can’t sense it
it’s not metal alright.
Oh, i forgot next week my husband will be here we got a tailor
Its hard to give those up
But i will
I promise
i still want to see you the weekend after
You my baby
Being around all bitches make me crazy
Next thing you know
it’s a five year turn around and after our daughter and a fifteen year bid I’m coming home now
Let me be there for you how you were there for me
The last thing i want is to be in these streets
But that was a lie
Cause i can’t get you in the house at night
You won’t take me to a dinner
Or walk the streets with me
But every time somebody call you
Your removing yourself from the sheets with me
You only sleep here
cause the dinner i cook for our family
you never eat here
And these bitches you running the streets with
Who never had time for you...
Now you wanting to sleep with
Don’t get mad when i shut down and close my legs
Just let me be
And suffer in the bed that i made
You come in the house with mew gear
Only for you
Knowing that our daughter needs
And that your girls here
But its ok though
Cause
Thanks to God
He gave me this new paige that has me seeing crystal clear
So after a long night when youve been fucking and spending time without your family don’t get me mad when the door is locked and you cant get in the room
Lay on the fucking floor by the door
And wait for me to open it
And when i do
Smile bitch even if my face is stoned
Cause when your wrong you don’t any rights
If i come in the house and burn all your shit
And you go in the closet to see nothing but ashes
Bend over and let me fuck you
So you can taste this bullshit
How dare you react to my reaction to your actions
What hurts most
i gave you everything
my entire body
Let you in my mental space
Where i let nobody
Let you in my entire space
Made you a somebody
And you abandoned me for nobody’s
Your families curse,
Your.biggest fear,
Now you’re doing the abandonment to the only family that was ever there
one day everything i say to you will explode in the bottom of your stomach and travel through your heart up to your cerebellum.
you’re gonna wish you would have listened
but
It will be too late.
(2013)
