Empty Space
There is an empty space in my heart.
I mourn the loss of the love,
the trust,
the comfort that used to fill it.
I try to just breathe and be ok with where I am now.
But how can you,
knowing the joy that used to be there,
settle into the absence.
How do you accept that what you think should be,
is no longer.
I still feel love, I still feel joy,
but that one piece,
that very important piece,
is gone.
I still give love, I still give joy,
but I hesitate…
If I let go of the wanting,
the deep rooted need to fill what is missing,
will it come back someday?
I am afraid to let it go,
and yet I realize,
it is already gone.
There is no choice, only acceptance of what is.
I am grasping for something that is not there,
fighting a battle I can never win.
So I continue to breathe,
I continue to let go and accept where I am, but…
There is an empty space in my heart.
(2013)
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