my hands tremble while another tear streams down my face. blade in hand, ready to make that first cut. I send up a quick prayer, hoping this takes me away. I can hear the angels singing the sweetest, most serene lullaby. it’s my turn to go. I feel as if I’ve screamed for so long, but I’ve been silent to others. well, this silence would be the loudest scream anyone’s ever heard. suddenly, a burst of strength attacks me. it tells my hand to release the blade and relax. breathe. it gives me purpose. it gives me hope. it tells me that I have power to hold things together, and to show who I really am. it gives me the credit I deserve. it is you.