In truth I am lost in reverie, floating in the cosmos of melancholia, transfix in solace of the quiet, wallowing in self sought disgust this is how I have become

I can’t deny any longer

I will never be one among many

You can not find me, I am nowhere, I am nothing

Perhaps, somewhere, in a different plane my existence isn’t tainted. I could not lift myself up, I did not reach anyone the scars on my arm a reminder of what’s within

Tell me how could I be grateful? Cause I am not, why must we put meaning into our existence wouldn’t be delightful to see everything fall on the ground

In truth it is difficult to tame my lies

There can no longer be a beginning

It’s too late for me

I am rotten at the core awaiting punishment

I didn’t resist change

I was left behind

but maybe

I’m nonchalant

maybe it was intended