Some primal termite knocked on woo… And tasted it, and found it good! And that is why your Cousin May Fell through the parlor floor toda…

When I remember bygone days I think how evening follows morn; So many I loved were not yet dead… So many I love were not yet born.

My fellow man I do not care for. I often ask me, What’s he there f… The only answer I can find Is, Reproduction of his kind. If I’m supposed to swallow that,

One way to be very happy is to be… For then you can buy orchids by th… And yet at the same time People d… Because it’s very funny But somehow if you’re rich enough…

There is something about a Martin… A tingle remarkably pleasant; A yellow, a mellow Martini; I wish I had one at present. There is something about a Martin…

Adam Had’em

In January everything freezes. We have two children. Both are sh… This is our January rule: One girl in bed, and one in school… In February the blizzard whirls.

I would live all my life in noncha… Were it not for making a living, w…

I sit in an office at 244 Madison… And say to myself You have a resp… Why then do you fritter away your… If you have a sore throat you can… If you have a sore foot you can ge…

Now another day is breaking, Sleep was sweet and so is waking. Dear Lord, I promised you last ni… Never again to sulk or fight. Such vows are easier to keep

The grackle’s voice is less than m… His heart is black, his eye is yel… He bullies more attractive birds With hoodlum deeds and vulgar word… And should a human interfere,

Higgledy piggledy, my black hen, She lays eggs for gentlemen. Gentlemen come every day To count what my black hen doth la… If perchance she lays too many,

The truth I do not stretch or sho… When I state that the dog is full… I’ve also found, by actual test, A wet dog is the lovingest.

Tell me, O Octopus, I begs Is those things arms, or is they l… I marvel at thee, Octopus; If I were thou, I’d call me Us.

Song of the Open Road I think that I shall never see A billboard as lovely as a tree. Perhaps unless the billboards fall… I’ll never see a tree at all.