Dear Dad:
Dear Dad (You know who you are): You were never there. I hope you aren't expecting some sort of compensation for the lost time. You wasted your time not showing up to the arranged visitation times, destroying lamps, and yelling at me for LAUGHING. At this point, I want to forget you and my childhood.
Thank you for all the trauma,
Paige
Hi Dad.
I’d like you to know
I’m finally
Unboxing each memory
Framed
Fragile...
Yet somehow
They remain
Untouched by time.
The bad ones,
At least.
They remain in my mouth
A flavor I can’t seem
To forget.
Some are sour.
Others are bitter.
All are painful.
I bite my tongue as
A new box resurfaces.
I slowly unwrap
The box.
Finally;
A good memory.
How unfortunate.
It is tainted.
Stained with age.
In the picture I smile,
But shadows dance on the walls.
I remember.
You are yelling.
They are trying
To appease
Your restless soul.
You are gone again.
Blueberries stain
The fabric of time.
Squished.
Once sweet,
But now I see that
The fruit I had been eating
Was poisonous.
You know what you did,
All those years ago,
And I’m unsure
If you care.
I want you to hurt,
To see you feel pain
Like I did,
So long ago.
Blackberries are smashed against
My mind’s eye.
They are bitter, sour
Taken too early.
It’s too bad,
Really,
That I’ve already unboxed
All my memories.
You must be regretting
The abuse
The lies
Everything.
Because in the everything
There is nothing.
You never cared.
You never stayed.
You never loved.
All I remember of you
Is fear.
I understand now
The constant
Fear
That I lived in.
The walls of that house
Still echo with
The terrors of my childhood.
I try to forget.
But you are
Burned into my memory.
I see the echoes.
I taste the memories.
You
are
a
Liar.
My dad left when I was 4, had anger management issues, and often didn't show up to the court assigned times for us to see each other. He never paid child support either, therefore owing us (my mother and sisters) over one hundred thousand dollars.
