Unwanted...
Emotions
The feeling of feeling unwanted..
By friends, my family members, and my partner can be challenging.
One minute life’s good, then the next I don’t know what’s happening.
Too be quite honest, I don’t know where to go from here.
Or if I should turn anywhere.
Everywhere I go I feel blocked
By pain, memories, full of miseries
And believe me, I don’t want no company here.
What am I doing here?? I ask myself everyday.
Channeling these thoughts the devil is playing in my head.
Denying I’m really depressed, denying if I didn’t have a kid, there’s no doubt, I’ll be dead.
I hide all of my emotions, in a bottle with the cap sealed tight.
Hoping nobody burst it, all the truths would come to light.
I don’t wanna be a burden to anyone who I love.
So I rather sit in my thoughts & let the emotions run
Through my brain,
Thoughts running through my mind seeing myself bleed through my veins.
Everybody want something from me
And use me in vain
My soul, my identity has been taken, I have no name.
I am unwanted, invisible & disposable
All In the inside.
My outsides never speaks it, my scars never show up
Unless, I’m looking in the mirror.
When I look in the mirror, I see a little girl, that is damaged.
That hate herself..
I see flames around her, flames in her eyes
She doesn’t mind if she lost a fight..
Then, a knock on the door, from my son saves me from this fire everyday.
Screaming my name
Mommy!
Mommy!
Mommy!
I come right back to reality lying, pretending I want to be here.
Lying to my friends, my family members, and my partner I’m ok.
When I’m not.
I have friends everyday knocking at my door
Anxiety, depression & loneliness.
I want to give up...
