Stray Cat.
not really ready to read yet...as It is not cohesive yet. Playful , loved the idea of a stray cat , meant to flip flop between playful nursery rhyme to serious lyrical...the resolve gets steadily weaker.. Still not quite together yet as so many of mine are not...but still my process. Many inspirations ..will have more cat metaphors eventually...this is also one I'll downsize and fix length ..just have to put what I had for now.
when I say what I want
I mean it the first time
or no, it wouldn’t be said.
it’s not my fault if they can’t hear it in rhyme.
I don’t drop pieces of thread
to be chased
I say it straight
it’s all been said.
I can, without words get in bed.
I can live while dead.
so they don’t have to be fake.
I’ll give what I take.
I give til I have no more.
and I don’t mean of the world
I give of my soul.
but it’s mine.
you can’t have anymore
the rest I’ll need something for.
and I don’t want money.
titles or an aisle.
promise on file
it is already right here.
want whats been given
so this is where it ends
if my words aren’t heard
then I make no amends.
go where you wanna be
where you belong.
I’ll end this stalemate
check mate
so long
power struggles are useless.
I told you I could not go on.
that id flip the tables before it was done.
mystery so needless
I cant go for that.
you never knew what you were looking at
talking to, meowing at.
I said out loud the act ain’t smart.
that Ill give chances
until it hurts the heart.
then I’ll open the door.
I’ll set you free
since that’s what you want
but don’t come back this way.
no, not even to play.
you bit back too many times
but not in the right way.
seems you can’t have your treat and eat it too.
I told you so many times, so you knew.
don’t play pretend.
that was the long way around to run away.
I put up walls to defend.
oh but I knew it all along.
go home stray cat.
go where you belong.
sing your song in your own alley
and as long as they sing along
I’ll remember you fondly
be happy, youre happy.
otherwise it’s not my fault you didn’t cross the fence
that you thought of me in past tense
not an answer
when your name was called.
you had another name all along.
go home stray cat.
go where you belong.
and before you say that I am not any different.
read what was said.
in the letters we’ve written.
the ones you torn from the mailbox.
pretended did not exist.
if you insist.
I tried.
you lied.
go home, stray cat
just don’t feel alone.
or jump high up
at rings in the phone.
lay comfortably now.
I’m sure it’ll be nice
I called once then thrice.
but you never did see.
so now closely listen
we both know a piece
will always be missing
we both know the piece
that will always feel missing.
it’s time to ask the same.
what one was to expect?
I remember every single one
yet I never said a word I regret.
do you yet?
go home.
go where you wanna be.
where you belong.
all I had to do was hear a misplaced word.
I’m never cold, never aloof.
I heard every single one.
to cut it off for such a reason?
about as foolish as the first time I’d say
so we both have faults.
but you refused to see that as a gift.
so I’ve set adrift.
little cat you don’t like to be wet
your earth is rooted.
but hey.
cat.
go home and play.
don’t ever think our way.
they’ll never understand you
never understand.
but they still love you.
so get on home.
too much alike to see the truth.
good thing I got eyes above me.
below me
everywhere but watching out my own mind.
you know your way to me.
you know how to find
me.
you out the door, I will let
my pet.
into the unknown.
gotta work on the soul
I always understood.
well go.
look closer.
under the moon.
you may see the truth.
my eyes glow.
a cold wind blows.
go on home.
I was once the one meowing at your window.
with the moon.
now I’ve gone on
to a home that’s not mine.
a day is a year
a weeks a decade
an hrs forever.
I’m sorry.
I’m just not clever.
words are what I hear.
you taught me to not hear the truth
deep in the wind
even though I disagree.
so flee, be free.
did you really say those things because of pain?
does that make me insane?
or did it make me right about what was real?
and I could not go on knowing the truth.
while you telling me the lie.
you could’ve loved
or wanted to run away?
I said I played no games.
don’t you see the damage?
when words and feelings aren’t the same?
no one will love you more than I.
yet j’ll never be just your friend
you’ll always be my friend.
so my friend.
this is where we part.
you know the next rhyme.
because you have it all.
but so long
it’s almost fall.
gets cold.
I forget we were made there.
but get on home.
shape shifter, take of my voice
you knew my choice.
so confusing the noise.
you cannot fake that?
well then what did you fake?
go on.
if you ever once felt what I already knew
you did it all a different way
love, then obstacles along the way
that’s how I understand
not the other way
around.
that’s not how you find what should’ve been found.
start from ground.
never angry,
not one for dramatics
steady as true.
I tried to say never through.
you know I’m always you.
your free to flee
door open to escape honest intentions
oh I tried to mention.
but you never did see.
so now closely listen
we both know a piece
will always be missing
we both know the piece
that will always feel missing.
go home now
go where you belong
where you should
so be gone
oh you knew me
said you did not.
did you ever know what you were running from?
I’m always right here.
when you want.
I never erased a thing
I doubt I have to confess that
the breaks in the chain?
they always,
always meld back.
just tests that were failed.
not a flip flop
no anger.
simply tests
that I wish had no reason
remember the season?
but it’s always been.
always been right back
feels like the beginning again.
then the end.
I wish you could be cruel.
but nothing makes it easy.
the place of everyone I really cared about
was taken.
now Its just empty
I won’t feel good either way.
can’t you just tell me you wanna go home?
because it was all too aligned
and I find.
unless you say so.
well I can’t let it go
birth, life and death
just a chance that came to be
the missing part of me.
walk down the alley with me
it’s not night and not day.
it’s gray
the color
there’s nothing else to say
you wanna lay
where you used to put your head?
then please do.
I know it’s not good.
if not I’ll pass you again maybe, never,
possible. doubtful, soon?
fear as well made me run from you..
I never wanted another cat
you know we are tied.
you know I’d never let you leave my side.
no matter the time.
but you choose what you choose.
don’t tell me you knew not how I felt.
I’ve never been the either/or sort.
I don’t paw at the fish slipping to and fro.
so little cat chase the ball that lives in your court
oh, didn’t you know?
so now listen closely
or closely listen
we both know a piece
will always be missing
we both know the piece
that will always feel missing.
when you wander
you know where.
when it comes down to it
I just want you to be okay
it’s not all I’ve left to say
yet listen close and I’m asking you
Ill ask you everyday
if I’ve gone gray
be okay.
—C.R.S
written in pieces idk when.
omg this painting I want. Had an alley cat then saw this...it does not exactly match but who cares. Love it....pretty much about finding out how much you love someone...but willing to let them go to where they are happiest because of the nature of it all.... but with a doubt and fear ..also knowing a piece of both is still lost..no matter the happy...it's not really a poem that needs explaining. cats by nature love flattery...slot of symbolism there.
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