Don't letter me back
to Lolly
My dearest mother
even though we stand on the edge,
even though I am pushed far to fall off the ledge.
It was never you,
so scrutinizing and judgemental that was all me about me.
I feel more for you,
You are the view of me,
I reflect in you
I think for you,
you think to me.
I know when I don’t feel you feel for me.
I know when I’m not nervous you are for me.
When I’m in pain you cry for me.
When I’m not afraid you fear for me.
When i can’t forgive you are sorry for me.
When I can’t apologize you reason for me.
When I can’t fight you push me to.
We were entertwined at birth.
Even though I stand afar for the hate of me
self destructing and denying us.
I will never tell you know me.
I stand afar you see me.
I speak quiet you hear me.
We are attached apart
But forever unattached.
(2015)
