There was a time in my life when I had it all I always held my head high, I always walked very tall My head full of dreams and my heart full of hope One day that all changed and I was unable to cope

My pain fell like rain it began to flood all around too tired to swim I started to drown The most precious things in life had been taken from me I lost not only my mom but my whole family

Now my heart full of sorrow and barely at tear left to cry few days came along that I wasn’t ready to die I thought I could take it, stay consistently strong but as I sat there in tears, I must have been wrong

One can’t be strong all of time not in anyone’s world and I know not in mine I know there are those who have been through much more but only experience I have are my times at deaths door

Though not my own life and that I would rather but it was those that I love that death came to gather With each death I lost a piece of my soul each one left me more shattered feeling no longer whole

As my own health declined sadly at my own hands my life would now dangle by a few delicate strands Now with nobody left no one to save I had to focus on me before I dug my own grave

I’ve never been good at taking care of me I guess it was easier when there was an “us” or a “we” I had been numbing myself I had all I could take waves washing over me In an emotional wake

Now with nothing to lose my last card had been played time to refocus my life with plans carefully laid I had to remove myself from the pressures in life the conflict, the struggle always living in strife

To be happy in life you must learn to be happy alone a hard lesson in life from which I have grown I decided my next funeral will be my own and I’ve learned that’s true we must reap what we’ve sewn

So now with some wisdom placed under my belt I feel more equipped to play the hand I’ve been dealt Some may think I’m selfish, I feel I’ve paid my dues Time to hum something happy instead of singing the blues Now its on with life’s journey a trip I will happily make for I know the key is if you don’t bend you will break