Jamie Marie
The 18th of May I celebrate the birth of my little girl,
Born blue-eyed rosy complexion and a little blond twirl.
After having two boys my bouncing baby girl came as a blessing in disguise,
For she always touched my heart with her sheepish baby blue eyes.
So beautiful and innocent with a warm inner glow,
It shook me to my soul when the doctor said “ she’s sick you know”
I cried and prayed and cried some more; and cursed God for bringing this cruel sickness to my front door
Feeling sorry for myself and the consequence of my fate, I let my heart begin to fill with anger and hate
I lashed out in anger, why did this happen to me? How could this innocent beautiful young child be infected by my family tree?
I had forgotten the little girl and the struggles she would face
And when I looked at myself, felt nothing but disgrace
And worst of all I tried to hide in a bottle of beer
Hurting my little girl even more from year to year.
My selfishness and self-pity helped no one, I know
But in spite of me, my little angel’s courage and strength continued to grow.
Never asking for favors, or special treatments from us
She just continued growing stronger and at times I think she wondered why all the fuss?
Because I left home when she was only nine
Her teenage years are a blur in time.
Time spent together was fleeting at best
And I wondered often if her heart missed mine as I lay down to rest.
Without my two boys and my little girl, I felt a pain no man should know.
Watching from afar in bits and pieces as they continued to grow.
Not being able to hold them, or tuck them in became a reality and a fear;
That the three things I loved most in life would never again let me hold them near.
All of these thoughts rush to my mind this special day
Because I love you so very much and embrace you and thank you for not turning me away
My heart bursts with joy knowing you are a part of me
A beautiful young woman, a mother and my daughter Jamie Marie
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!
(2006)
My daughter was born with a genetic disease sometime referred to as " PKU" that can cause serious damage to the brain if not caught and treated in time . I wrote this about 2 AM the morning of her birthday I realized I had forgotten to send her a birthday card. Because she was only 9 when I divorced her Mother I always made it a point never to forget the kid's birthday's I felt so guilty because I had forgotten I got out of bed came downstairs to my office and the words just started to flow not only about her but my guilt with booze
