It’s not that I’m sad Though I am It’s not that I’m discouraged Though I am It soaks deeper

When the emotion comes up It feels like heartburn Like acid Clenching my throat My ears go watery

I wallow in my sadness As it pools up It has not swallowed me Who floats above its surface This surface

Antisocial tendencies Amplified by sickness I can people watch Yet I can’t people talk I am lonely

If I could make you smile Just once Sincerity From an appreciative heart It would make all of it worthwhile

Beautiful legs The right shape and curve Olive color without the green That tans and doesn’t burn Until you see

Strong hands Hold me down To the bed I say to them I have to go

If I could paint a man Eyes so dark they shine Brooding and stormy Til the smile breaks through If I could paint a man

A conversation With a true friend Leaves your life richer Maybe with a laugh A smile on your face

My objective is selfish Not to share or be heard To get it out and move on No one seems to hear my pain No one seems to feel my pain

Scratchy plaid blanket Red with yellow stripes Hot and itchy underneath Claustrophobia strikes Purple and blue prisms