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Ten Things I'll Never Tell You

1) From the very first second I saw you, you have been the only one I want. Thoughts of anybody else vanished and have not returned. From the very first day, you have been the first and last thought in my mind, as well as every thought in between.
2) When you’re beside me, I don’t care about anything else. You beside me is all that matters. I feel like that’s where we should be.
3) I’ll never be able to explain to you fully how much I want you. I want your hands in mine. I want our fingers interlocked. I want our bodies wrapped around each other. I want to know  the sound of your heartbeat and the taste of your breath. I want you. So much.
4) Every time you walk away, it hurts. More than you know. It’s like a part of me leaves too. When you turn your back to me, it stings.
5) Sometimes, thoughts of you are all that keep me going. When I’m lonely and feeling unloved and unwanted, I remember all the sweet things you’ve said to me and it gives me just enough faith to go on.
6) I spend an unhealthy amount of my time daydreaming about you. About us. I picture us wrapped up in a blanket and watching Princess Bride, or climbing mountains, or shopping for Christmas gifts, or simply holding hands. Anything at all really. It makes me happy.
7) I’ve cried many times because of you. Not because you hurt me, but because you hurt yourself. You’re worth so much more than you think you are. It kills me that you can’t see it. I’d give anything to make you see it. Please, see it.
8) I honestly, wholeheartedly, believe that you are perfect for me. I know you may not be perfect, but for me, you are.
9) I wish for you every chance I get. I pray for you every night. I thank God for you and ask him to please let me have this one. I pray that you’ll be happy and know that you’re absolutely beautiful. I pray that you’ll be safe, from the world the world and from yourself.
10) I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you. I absolutely adore you. I love you so much. It’s terrifying. It scares me because it means you’ll hurt me 100x more than anyone else did when you leave me.

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