longing for feelings

when the seed turns to dust
and we can only lust
after the thoughts
of the beginning
to only find the end
I only wanted a friend
turning the page
or rolling the dice
trying to find something nice
playing the game
as if it was life
hoping someday to be a wife
of the friend and lover
the soul mate
of my other
but living for your self
like it is your choice
had a foster mom named joyce
taking the steps
to find the way
a way in which to go
one not to high, but not to low
still fighting the feelings
as nobody knows
sometimes getting stuck in the lows
facade the fake is not my desire
but to live life free as GOD desires

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