‘Dear friends, we surely all agree There’s almost nothing worse to se… Than some repulsive little bum Who’s always chewing chewing gum. (It’s very near as bad as those

‘If you are old and have the shake… If all your bones are full of ache… If you can hardly walk at all, If living drives you up the wall, If you’re a grump and full of spit…

The animal I really dig, Above all others is the pig. Pigs are noble. Pigs are clever, Pigs are courteous. However, Now and then, to break this rule,

There’s no earthly way of knowing Which direction they are going! There’s no knowing where they’re r… Or which way they river’s flowing! Not a speck of light is showing,

“My teacher wasn't half as nice as… His name was Mister Unsworth and… And when you didn't know a date he… And start to twist while you sat t… He'd twist and twist and twist you…

I never thought my life could be Anything but catastrophe But suddenly I begin to see A bit of good luck for me ‘Cause I’ve got a golden ticket

Round the world and home again That’s the sailor’s way Faster faster, faster faster There’s no earthly way of knowing Which direction we are going

As I was going to St Ives I met a man with seven wives Said he, 'I think it’s much more… Than getting stuck with only one.’

Gooses, geeses I want my geese to lay gold eggs f… At least a hundred a day And by the way I want a feast

‘Augustus Gloop! Augustus Gloop! The great big greedy nincompoop! How long could we allow this beast To gorge and guzzle, feed and feas… On everything he wanted to?

The most important thing we’ve lea… So far as children are concerned, Is never, NEVER, NEVER let Them near your television set— Or better still, just don’t instal…

I had a little nut-tree, Nothing would it bear. I searched in all its branches, But not a nut was there. ‘Oh, little tree,’ I begged,

Mary, Mary, quite contrary How does your garden grow? ‘I live with my brat in a high-ris… So how in the world would I know.…

‘No animal is half as vile As Crocky-Wock, the crocodile. On Saturdays he likes to crunch Six juicy children for his lunch And he especially enjoys

I guess you think you know this st… You don’t. The real one’s much mo… The phoney one, the one you know, Was cooked up years and years ago, And made to sound all soft and sap…