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Stuart Munro

Pulling on a Church Bell Rope

I’ve been pulling on a church bell rope
Trying to encourage some hope
In my Elton John high platform shoes
And my hair spiked upwards, in superglue
 
I’ve climbed on the church slate roof
Flown in an air balloon, to, a cloud with truth
Bought a ticket, for rocket ship to Mars
Till then, I’m on a roof at Spar
 
The vicar said get nearer to God
And he was only five foot three tall
Well! How the hell did he get the call?
I’m over six feet, in bare feet, and I’m appalled

Other works by Stuart Munro...
Long Departed Jew

Long departed Jew, did all kinds… Left his memory, after Death and… Long departed Jew, his old house… His ghost is maybe in there, in yo… Long departed Jew, did you think…
 1
Wandering around in Silky Pyjamas

Wandering around in Silky Pyjamas Playing a trombone The dusty old red curtains hang From the chipped framed window A material like face gurning
Balcony man

An old man sits on his Balcony Looking out on you and me Sitting there with his bonsai tree Looking like there’s a world to se… He’s up there in his block of flat…
 4
 1
Where’s the Exit?

Clutched in sit, you are in the sc… Munching fielded flowers, in tickl… Jumping down on a road drill Built those sinews, in arms, up There you are, strangling a hurt c…
How many Psychiatrists?

How many Psychiatrists does it ta… You tell me, Says the Asylum inma…
Well! There, there

While sitting in your chair Looking at the toenails, on your f… While I’m unaware, of your stare… Are you feeling hard dumb by, well… While laying on your bed
Bad Old Town

Back to that bad old town That place that got me down You said “never turn around “, But since then, I’ve gone to grou… I had to sell my old gold teeth
 2
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Cooking Love

I’m cooking love, it smells so nic… I’m cooking love, I’m eating life Gosh! It tastes so nice The best taste in life I’m cooking love
Osteopath Mans Discus Dilemma

He discovered childhood, dry Soma… A teenage wildlife officer with si… Met topical guests and Coal Scutt… Then wore a deaf aid as a Sotheby… His restoration of former Glassho…
My Father was a Trampoline maker

My father was a trampoline maker But he had his ups and downs But when he sprung his life into a… He nearly ended up in town My mother made pogo sticks
An Undertaker Goes to the Doctors

An Undertaker Goes to the Docto… The Doctors asks “ what’s the pro… The Undertakers replies “ I feel… The Doctor replies “Well in your… “ your over doing it “, you need t…
 2
 1
It Could be Worse

It could be worse Written on the gravestone In the unkept churchyard by the se… Other Dead people had it worse th… It’s no good feeling sorry for you…
Feeding the Asylum Cat

My homes next door to the asylum In the garden there’s a cave full… The Mad Hatter and me are having… He’s in his 10/6 pence Hat And I’m feeding the Asylum Cat
Boltholes of Hustle and Bustle

As I explore the legacy of featur… The presenter lifts the lid on the… And a woman seeks the feel of her… As I sit disjointed making romper… Then I get a visit from a chef
Yellow Hat Positive

He was a lousy mind reader But he was yellow hat positive He thought he had X Ray vision And took porridge in a lift He made sure he was measuring



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