Sticky Pooh
Your attention please
I’m going to make a toast,
to a schizo freaky mama
who’s barely normal at the most.
You see it’s her birthday
and I want to say some words,
but she’s a smart aleck
who thinks jabbering’s for the birds.
She’s not only weird
she is some what deranged,
it’s how she was at first
and she never changed.
She despises left wingers
she tramples them with her horses,
and she prefers leathernecks
over members of the special forces.
And she has a big gun
and she knows how to use it,
and if you poke your nose in her business
you’re liable to lose it.
And she won’t eat fish
and she will not chew gum,
but if you touch her pollo poblano
she will beat you like a drum.
And she has a sappy bulldog
that she loves without a doubt,
even when there’s slobber
driveling from its snout.
And she hates the taste of coffee
and she don’t drink cokes,
but she really does enjoy
playing sick childish jokes.
And ever time I’m near her
she tells me to leave,
she says I irritate her
to the point that she could heave.
But if she happens to like you
then welcome to the crew,
consider yourself lucky
to be one of the proud and few.
And when she and her pal heat rash
formed the ignore the losers club,
I made an attempt to join
but got their standard snub.
Anyway here’s to a happy birthday
and a merry Christmas too,
to a big hearted turkey
whose name rhymes with sticky pooh.:)
(2014)
