I was happy alone Because being together Meant being lonely Until you showed me That being together

Why would they still offer A penny for our thoughts When they can buy in bulk

The left was once really good at keeping capitalism in check but then they lost their identity and have been looking for one ever… oblivious that it’s long since

Rule #1- Where God says no, the devil says… And where the devil says no, God… Rule #2- If everybody knows the answers ahe…

In the movies they always guess right when it’s time to cut the blue wire or the red wire on the ticking time bomb

No sooner were the gates free of b… than we’d paired off and squared off as fascists vs. totalitarians And as for the dissidents not spoi…

Guilt is intolerable which is why “I can explain everything” is processed into “I have a theory which explains ev…

A fair competition Is one in which No one can win So that everyone Has an equal chance

All dressed down with nowhere to go

I was happily feeding at the trough when I noticed it had been filled with finger food

Higher education purports to prepare you for life when really it exists to indebt you for life, expanding campus ideology

In theory rule by consensus sounds more democratic but in practice it leads to hung juries

This is the stage in history where we all give constructive cri… to the demolition crew

You can’t burn a bridge when they’ve already dismantled th… to keep you out but you can burn an eternal flame to mark the location

Like a fine wine liberalism only rises to the subli… with a good pairing