Hell is having infinite wishes but using them all to wish for infinite wishes Heaven is having infinite wishes but only needing

Somewhere between 27% and 53% of… none of which students can legally… is wasted Let’s split the difference and call it 40%

The phrase A woman’s intuition Tells us that a woman Is more intuitive Than a man

I have half a mind to lose my mind and half a mind to find God The question, natch

Entire lives can be lived waiting for the other shoe to drop although often this just means you’re being crushed at a snail’s…

When they told me I was one of many I took them to mean I was the one

Never answer a yes or no question. Answer the question that you wish had been asked of you: “Ms. Magill, I’m gonna give you one more opportunity for the world to see your answer. Does...

When you move fast and break thing… broken things can’t move dividing us into those who can’t move and those who are unmoved

Many people think of life as a gift but to me it’s more like

Everyone thinks Vladimir and Estr… stay together because they’re both waiting for Godot when really it’s their mutual disdain for Wile E. Coyote

Because bodies make a fart joke of… etiquette used to dictate that whe… passed gas at, e.g., a dinner part… the polite thing to do was to pret… the fart never happened

Male materialists rarely make for marriage material because in their insistence that life’s not fair they further insist

When women need a break from the m… they must be able to endure a whole lot of his navel gazing

The number one rule For doing a number on us Is taking a number Because when our number comes up It’s only ever because our days ar…

I will gladly suffer fools for love