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Chris Gaither

What, Me Worry?

The funny thing is
if you’re continually nervous
about getting into a wreck
you become a nervous wreck
and then
inevitably
you get into a wreck

Other works by Chris Gaither...
Ironic Distance Is Self-distancing

You know a hipster is aging gracef… When he comes to see that Objects in mirror Are closer than they appear
I Should Have Picked Jerk Chicken

When I picked candy apples as my… (think spirit animals for foodies) I honestly had no idea I was naturally sweet but laid it on way too thick
Shattering the Mirror Stage, Collecting the Shards, and Releasing the Spark of God’s Light

I am not who I think I am I am not who you think I am And I am not even who I think you… I am who I-Am-Who-I-Am thinks I…
I Mean What I Say

Like the fern which is seedless but doesn’t lack seeds the universe (that cannot be named… is meaningless
“I’d Like to Help You in Your Struggle to Be Free”

A wise man once told me When you don’t know what to do do nothing A wise politician
Just Desert

The climate change deniers missed the boat on all the ocean front property in Arizon…
“Our nervous system is simultaneously being challenged by incompatible demands demanding both avoidance of contact with the SARSCov2 virus and the fulfillment of our biological imperative of connecting with others to feel calm and safe”

The genius of Big Tech’s business… is its simplicity: Get people to pay for what they had previously accessed for free
 1
Surely, You Don’t Really Believe That

People are the opposite of baked potatoes– If you keep poking holes in their theories they will explode
The Man Cave Scrolls

Successful interpretation of the m… Codex on the Golden Rule found in the cavernous ruins of early 21st century civilization may hold the key to understanding
Saving Face

Not to be outdone I cut my face off to spite my nose
Good Things Come to Those Who Wait Together

The best way to feel in control even though all control is an illusion is to stand in a line
Money Doesn’t Grow on Trees, It Grows on Memes

You start out needing money to advance your ideology but you end up mouthing your ideol… to rake in more money
If You’re Lucky, Your True Soulmate Becomes Your Real Helpmate

We expect a fiduciary relationship with our financial advisors and all they do is help handle the money Yet we so often fail
Managers Don’t Get Paid for Overbites

Until the company’s weekend retrea… I didn’t know that my leadership s… was like never having braces but still wearing a retainer
King of the Molehill

Where once man strove to move mountains now he settles for making them



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