Academic Editors I hate the callow ones who think t… And have therefore the right to cr… I hate the ones who charge me twen… So I can try to win a ten-buck pr…

Midwest Opera The local mogul, tall, horse-jawed… machine-tool king, accompanied by his grim chic wife, strolls down the aisle,

Sports News from Mudville (Thanks to “Casey at the Bat”) The outlook’s great for all you fo… Linebacker Doakes was just picked… Then football’s finest running bac…

Football: This Sport is Too Muc… (With Apologies to Wordsworth) This sport is too much with us; da… Cheering and moaning, we cater to… Little we see but plays and then r…

A Disney creature has soulful eye… Inhales the posies, gnaws no flesh… Knows sin from virtue in a flash And sobs a quart when Mother dies… A Disney creature lacks an anus,

I am a horse, a patient, plodding hack harnessed behind a chromed cart — a cart I push when told to go and stop when told to whoa.

At a photo op outrageous beyond be… Bush does a little jig between two… back from Iraq with artificial leg… (Oh, you victims, you crippled sac… if only one of you had leaned on…

Don’t shock me with your atheistic… God gave us all a book that proves… And serves us as a guide for all w… excepting parts that don’t make se… God serves us like a good psycholo…

These two of disparate genes were once Mother, Father; These linoleumed tunnels the marbled halls of my grade scho… where the children’s orchestra,

The Jacaranda in Spring (Near Rhyme) What discount art inspired this ta… Eleven months a year you’re quite… Too dark and gaunt, we thought, to…

Give Me More Light Give me more light I’m getting desperate here, you kn… show me what you’ve got is Ann Landers still around?

A poem should be allowed to say something; good ones often have. It isn’t by necessity a fakir’s cabalistic drone