System Restore (free verse with incidental rhyme,… Last week, not thinking, I punched a strange computer key and spawned unceasing lunatic para…

Now, the fathers, having suffered… prospering, gave unto their begotten plowshare… seeds that their begotten might also pro…

Argument from Design God’s antelopes have eyes placed f… And horizontal pupils, features th… Employ to see wide spans and speed… From lurking predators they’ve eas…

Give Me More Light Give me more light I’m getting desperate here, you kn… show me what you’ve got is Ann Landers still around?

The Star See that star that now appears To glisten in the sky? It took perhaps a million years For it to reach your eye.

A big brown dog, gray around the muzzle, lay in the front yard of an old h… between his front paws a tennis ba… As we walked by,

Pasiphae, like any ancient Greek, Was avid fan of bestiality And lusted for the Cretan bull’s… But he, bull-headed, snubbed her u… For this bovine disliked a human f…

Leda Lays an Egg One morning Leda, sitting on the… Saw Zeus appear transmogrified to… She heard too late the honks and w… And so with godly force he conquer…

Postscript for the Statue of Libe… Oh, say, you huddled masses, when… My golden shores, you must at once… Remove your greasy ball cap, beat… From all your rags, and curb the “…

The plank is narrow, more narrow than when he started; he could slip off at any time. The wood is slick, too, threatening again a premature plun…

Hilarious Slants on Being Told You Have Prostate Cancer Can you empathize with Wile E. C… at that moment when he freezes in the air,

ODE TO TESTOSTERONE… When it comes to a war or driving… I do both to some stirring ovation… In fights I’m a scuffler and my c… So I’m ready for all provocations…

Sure, ask who died, and ask why J… Won’t have Brad’s baby, whom she’… Read how the princess slept with h… See Mary’s image on a slice of br… Get proof that so-and-so’s a murde…

I hate Shaw with his absurd postu… who want to get in his pants to ca… I hate Henry James for writing se… it takes a cryptologist to figure… I hate Hemingway for his drunken…

Miniver Cheevy Rides Again or You’ve Got a Problem with That? I sew women’s gingham bonnets. I assemble covered wagons.