Sister
Mommy.
You were the first person who held me.
You woke up in the night when I was hungry.
You let me share your bed when I had a bad dream.
Daddy.
You were by mommy’s side.
You made me sick soup when I wasn’t feeling well.
You shared the couch so I could watch NASCAR with you.
Brother.
You were so excited to see me.
You played with me when I was bored.
You shared your wrestling dudes even when you didn’t want too.
But then something went wrong.
Daddy was leaving.
Mommy why is daddy leaving?
Mommy?
Mommy what’s the matter with brother?
Mommy I need help.
Mommy?
Can’t you see me?
Mommy!
Can’t your hear me!
Daddy!
Daddy where did you go?!
Daddy... why did you go.
Daddy I’m scared.
Darkness.
You were there for me.
You comforted me when nobody else would.
You became my best friend.
We would have sleepovers.
Every night.
We went everywhere together.
Meanwhile mommy was helping brother with some problems that I had only just begun to realize that I had too.
Anger.
Became my outlet.
Depression.
Became my excuse.
My stairway to heaven was spiraling downward toward something I didn’t even know was possible.
I was lost.
Mommy and daddy were supposed to be together forever.
Forever isn’t as long as I thought.
It wasn’t “until death do us part”, but “until we don’t want to try anymore”.
Mommy tried her best but her best wasn’t enough.
Not for me.
Sister.
You see sister learned fast.
Keep your troubles to yourself and don’t bother mommy or brother because they were too busy and daddy was gone.
Sister tried to pretend that everything was just fine but when you shake a can of soda long enough eventually it explodes everywhere and then your left to clean up the mess.
My life became the story of Humpty Dumpty except I didn’t have the kings horsemen or any of the kings men to help put me back together.
When I fell so far that I broke I was left alone to pick up the pieces of myself that had scattered like crumbs all over the carpet.
Mommy.
Your best wasn’t enough but at least you tried.
Daddy.
You left me in person but never in my heart.
Brother.
We shared our problems and fought them together.
Darkness.
You are no longer my friend.
Sister.
I can finally say that we can move forward, maybe a little scattered, broken and bruised, but we can do it.
(2015)
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