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serenity

"we will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace" - Big Book of Alcoholics Annonymous, page 63

 
“we will comprehend the word serenity”
it rings in my head like a melody
 
for this,
this is my destiny
 
i’m gifted
with immense capacity
strange intensity
and strong dependency
 
still,
i’m often trapped
for i get wrapped
inside my own buzzing head
 
i choose to adapt.
 
though
i’m baffled with life’s complexities
with addictions, depression, inflictions.
 
i find myself on a tightrope
shaking unsteadily
as i indulge in my addictions endlessly
any form of ecstasy
anything to make me feel ineffably
(probably reducing my life expectancy)
 
yet with strong conviction
for it is my tendency
 
i pick myself up cause it’s a necessity
i leap helplessly
 
knowing God, is Most Heavenly
for He is my entity
for He provides indemnity
 
for He,
He is my remedy.
 
He opens the eyes of my heart
i hear the trees shake delicately,
witness flowers bloom pleasantly,
as the moon shines so preciously.
 
i can feel!
not long ago,
a time where
i couldn’t yield
simple emotions like
sadness, anger, joy or zeal
 
it felt like i was left standing
in the middle of a battlefield
 
oh but i’m ambitious to heal
God, take the wheel
God, grant me serenity through each ordeal
 
for Your love,
only Your love is surreal

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

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