#AmericanWriters
To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you’re wrong, admit it; Whenever you’re right, shut up.
For years we’ve had a little dog, Last year we acquired a big dog; He wasn’t big when we got him, He was littler than the dog we had… We thought our little dog would lo…
The Lord in His wisdom made the f… And then forgot to tell us why.
Celery, raw Develops the jaw, But celery, stewed, Is more quietly chewed.
Though you know it anyhow Listen to me, darling, now, Proving what I need not prove How I know I love you, love. Near and far, near and far,
He who is ridden by a conscience Worries about a lot of nonscience; He without benefit of scruples His fun and income soon quadruples…
Purity Is obscurity.
People expect old men to die, They do not really mourn old men. Old men are different. People loo… At them with eyes that wonder when… People watch with unshocked eyes;
People live forever in Jacksonvil… But you don’t have to live forever… The entrance requirements for gram… You only have to live until your c… From that point on you start looki…
Nothing makes me sicker than liquor and candy is too expandy
Senescence begins And middle age ends The day your descendents Outnumber your friends.
Behold the hippopotamus! We laugh at how he looks to us, And yet in moments dank and grim, I wonder how we look to him. Peace, peace, thou hippopotamus!
Being a father Is quite a bother. You are as free as air With time to spare, You’re a fiscal rocket
The wasp and all his numerous fami… I look upon as a major calamity. He throws open his nest with prodi… But I distrust his waspitality.
This one is entering her teens, Ripe for sentimental scenes, Has picked a gangling unripe male, Sees herself in a bridal veil, Presses lips and tosses head,