Warm yet Cold
It could be sunny and hot outside,
I could be covered in layers of clothes,
The fire place could warm the entire house,
But my heart is always icy through all of that!
My hands are warm unlike the cold breath coming from my heart,
My body moves freely unlike the frozen soul within me.
It’s dangerous coz no one can see my pain since my tears no longer flow,
They are frozen together with the pain I thought was evaporating.
How can I voice out the thief of my happiness when my tongue is static?
How is it that I’m still surviving even though my blood is stationary?
Is my brain essential now that my thoughts are cubes of ice?
It is cold inside me,
It is freezing within my heart,
And my soul, my soul is an igloo.
Nothing can be done with warm water or fire,
Coz the breeze of ice overpowers every heat!
The cold is created by the negatives, the harmful and the insensitive.
The ice is built by the low temperature of blown wind of lies and disappointments.
The snow that falls, its part of the tearing heart they broke, stubbed and squeezed!
Words from a frozen heart cannot be easy to deal with,
They are hard rocks that draw an 'ouch’ expression on one’s face.
Cries of a cold soul aren’t just soft cries that could be ignored,
They break hearts as the soul breaks into snowy frosty sharp tears.
As a person does when feeling cold,
My voice crawls back to the voice box and curls itself up every time I want to talk.
Like a flame from a gas source blows,
My anger burns people’s hearts, living them with emotional wounds.
Icy, I hate
Healthy, I’m not
Happy is far from me
But trying, I am.
It’s never easy to melt a frozen ocean with a match stick,
It takes time, a lot of hands and way too many match sticks.
Patience is all I need before I become a patient in a mental institution!
Its warm but cold,
I smile even though I’m frowning,
I’m happy yet and angry,
But nothing is forever.
(2015)
When I was writing this poem I put myself in the shoes of those who are troubled and in pain but can't talk about it! Those who are seen as warm and the happiest while that is only the mask they use to cover the cold, anger and pain within them!
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