God knows that the only thing you can give the man who has everything is another chance

There was always an urn on the man… made from terra cotta Little then did I know it was for the remains of the persona non gra…

We’re running out of time Because we’re running So walk, don’t run For though we have no time to wast… Haste still makes waste

Some people say They were born too late; I was almost born too soon But then along came the internet Just in time to stop time–

She went to law school; I bet it all on brick ov– en pita and lost

Wittgenstein’s fly in the bottle consults the map for directions to find the map

It’s almost impossible to tell the difference between self-effacement and self-abasement In the former he stays down to earth

Happy me, happy precis: Happy wife, happy life

It was only once I became Observant That I became Observant

For the antisemite the Jews’ most galling offense is the audacity of their survival, decoding the latest antisemitic sl… the smear of “Jewish Supremacy”-

Decisions my wife doesn’t make are settled by stare decisis

Language is great for Letting us tell each other Where it hurts And you keep telling me It hurts when I don’t listen

It’s not that you’re jeal– ous, but that you guard your jeal– ousy jealously

In my second marriage I went all in on being authentic When she left she said that being with me

I don’t care about birds but I thrill when the squirrels can’t get to the birdseed